Recently, I made the logical decision to get a roommate.

So how to get one? The World Wide Web seemed like a logical next step since to the best of my knowledge I don’t know of anyone looking for a place in Orlando. (Thank you, Ms. D for the offer to move in with you, but the commute from Virginia to Florida would be hell on my little car.)

Three…no..four days later, I am frustrated and a little confused.  Several times over the last couple of days, I have been perplexed by folks seeking to reside with me. What follows are pieces of my internal monologue as I talk to potentials.

First, I don’t know you….

Seriously, I don’t know you.

Why would I rent you a room without seeing you and getting a deposit? Or with you giving me grief over asking for a deposit?

I really am sorry for your bad fortune, but are you high?

My last roomie left right before rent was due which messed up my carefully conceived budget.  It was for the best and there are no hard feelings, but still I would rather not go through the last minute where the bleep is rent coming from stress.

Plus, I don’t know you. Yes, I want someone to rent out the spare room, but I don’t want drama or more headaches than my life already provides naturally. (There is something that is blooming in the neighborhood at the moment that is killing my sinus and making me itch.)

My faithful attempts to win the lottery have failed and so finding a roomie would  to help cover rent and bills for the six weeks between summer school and the next school year when I enter the paycheck desert.  Plus, I can begin saving for Peru again. But, no I am not going to let you move in with me because you are a man who doesn’t know how to cook and wants a woman to do it for you.

So… no.